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Wife Swapping in Australia: Straight Talk for Couples Who Swap
Couple swapping in Australia is honest, relaxed and usually involves a pool. Two couples who get along have a night in and trade partners up to whatever line the four of them drew. Here's how Aussie couples find each other and keep it fun.
Partner swapping is the most sociable way to swing. You're not meeting a stranger; you're spending an evening with a couple you already like, who happen to fancy you as much as you fancy them. Australians tend to be good at this, because nobody takes themselves too seriously, and a nervous laugh at the right moment does more than any amount of smooth talk.
Soft, Full, and Who's Watching
Pick your level before your profile goes up, because it decides who gets in touch. Soft means the pashing and the touching are shared but sex isn't. Full means anything goes with the other partner, condoms on, all four agreed. First swaps nearly always happen within sight of each other, on the same couch or the same lounge room floor, so a quick look can say "you right?" Separate rooms usually come months later, with a couple you'd trust with your house keys.
Getting It Right
Your First Swap, Step by Step
Talk it through at home
What you'd like, what's a firm no, and the word that ends the night.
Get both of them talking
If only three of you are keen, it's a no. Message both partners.
Catch up for a drink
A pub halfway between you. One drink, no plans.
Plan the night
Whose place, soft or full, and who's driving home. Or nobody, and you stay over.
Swap Chat, Aussie Style
Most swaps begin with a week of messages that get steadily cheekier.
Wednesday, 9:20pm
My wife reckons your husband has great arms. I'm choosing not to be offended.
Tell her mine reckons the same about you. Saturday arvo, by the pool?
Done. We'll bring a cooler full of drinks. Swimmers optional, apparently.
Example messages
Ground Rules Aussie Swappers Swear By
- Spell it out beforehand. "We'll see how we go" is how nights go wrong.
- One "nah" stops the lot. Any of the four can pull the pin, no explanations.
- Bring your own condoms. Every time, no exceptions.
- Keep an eye on your other half. A wink across the room keeps you a team.
- What happens at the barbie stays at the barbie. Names and stories go nowhere.
For first-timer advice, distance tips and everything else ComeSwinging offers, start with swinging in Australia for couples and singles.
Pool Party Swaps, Done Properly
In an Aussie summer the swap usually starts in the water, and a few house rules keep the afternoon fun. Hosts put out towels, shade and plenty of water, because sunstroke kills the mood faster than anything. Guests bring their own drinks and keep the music at a level the neighbours over the back fence won't comment on. Phones go inside, face down, before anyone takes anything off. And if the arvo drifts into the evening and the evening drifts indoors, nobody hops back in the car after a few drinks; there's always a couch, a spare room or a taxi. The happiest pool party swaps feel like the easiest Saturday of the year, right up until they don't.
Wife Swapping in Australia: Questions
Where do Aussie couples find other couples who swap?
On profiles that say plainly "soft swap" or "full swap" and show a bit of personality. Couples in the capitals can afford to be fussy about distance; regional couples cast a wider net. Either way, the swap itself usually follows a week or two of chat and one easy drink.
Is swapping legal everywhere in Australia?
Yes. No state or territory makes it an offence for consenting adults to sleep with each other privately, from Darwin to Hobart.
Pool party or quiet night in?
Both have their fans. A quiet night with one other couple is easier for a first swap; a pool party with a few couples suits pairs who like a crowd and a bit of showing off. Say which you prefer on your profile.
What if one of us is keener than the other?
Talk it over before the next invitation. Often one of you loves to watch and the other loves to be watched, and once that's said out loud it can be a lovely kind of balance. If one of you isn't enjoying it, take a break.
Chill the Drinks. Bring Your Partner.
Make your joint profile and find Aussie couples who love to swap.